top of page


I’ve been caught 

by a strange Catch-22

a malfunction of the psyche

I have everything I’ve always wanted 

the things I dreamed about

and yet I long for the past

and I don’t know why

My dreams are haunted by people 

who never spoke to me 

who never cared

My memories vivid with idle childhood

the bright colors and smells 

the intense emotions 

hopes and dreams and fantasies 

conveniently hiding the dark anxieties

how I used to cry myself to sleep

holding my breath 

wondering if I would ever be missed 


I have everything I’ve ever wanted 

but I feel empty inside 

because I’ve seen the horrors of the world

because I know I can never truly fix it 

because I know that hope and faith is never enough

© 2023 Marieke de Koker

4 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All


bottom of page